Life after Loss: Coping with Grief and Bereavement

Grief is a journey—a process of mourning and healing. It’s feeling and drowning in a range of thoughts and emotions. But it's also something unique and personal that we all experience and navigate it differently.

It's a feeling that knows no boundaries, affecting us all regardless of where we come from. Yet, for all its universality, we as a society often struggle to truly understand the depth and complexity of grief.

Too often, people see grief as a burden to be shouldered, a feeling that should be swept aside or hidden away. People can be quick to offer hollow platitudes and empty words, urging us to "move on" or "get over it." Yet, these well-meaning sentiments miss the mark, failing to acknowledge the deep pain and sense of loss that accompanies grief.

Perhaps one of the most significant flaws in society's perception of grief is the notion that it's something we can prevent or avoid. We might try to shield ourselves from loss, building walls around our hearts and clinging tightly to what we have. 

But the truth is, grief is inevitable. We cannot control the ebb and flow of life, nor can we escape the pain that sometimes comes with it.

So, if we can't prevent grief, what can we do? How can we find our way through the storm and emerge on the other side?

The answer lies in understanding and accepting grief, in allowing ourselves to feel the pain and to process the emotions that come with it. It means being kind and patient with ourselves, acknowledging that healing takes time and that the journey of grief is not a linear one.

And it also means that we offer our support and understanding to those who are struggling. We need to be careful and considerate because one of the most common responses people give each other is "move on".

Some wait for a few days or months.

But eventually, if they care for you, they most likely won't be able to see you still clinging to your emotions and the past.

'Move on.'

People may say it is in the best interest but is it truly the only way? Do we have to just forget and ignore the lingering scars?

The Ethan M. Lindberg Foundation is one such example of the beauty that can arise from grief. The foundation was established in honor of Ethan, a young boy who lost his life to cancer. Through the foundation, his family and friends are working to provide support and resources to families impacted by pediatric cancer.

But the beauty that can arise from grief isn't limited to such large-scale efforts. Sometimes, it's the small gestures that can have the most profound impact. A handwritten letter, a shared memory, or a simple act of kindness can all be beautiful expressions of love and connection in the face of loss.

We can see examples of this beauty all around us, from the murals painted in memory of George Floyd to the countless songs and poems written in tribute to loved ones lost. In each of these examples, we see people channeling their grief into something positive, something that honors the memory of those they have lost and brings comfort to others who are suffering.

It's important to note that the beauty that arises from grief is not a dismissal of the pain and suffering that comes with it. Rather, it is a recognition that even in our darkest moments, there is still light and hope to be found.

Grief is a complex and nuanced emotion, one that can be difficult to navigate. But through that struggle, we can find new strength and resilience, and we can create something beautiful out of the pain.

What if instead, we stop trying to invalidate the emotions and the hurt?

What if we confront them and get through it instead of just moving on?

"What can we do but remind each other that some things can't be fixed, and not all wounds are meant to heal?", words by Nora Mclnerny, writer and podcaster, are a powerful reminder of the reality of grief.

It's a recognition that some pain cannot be fixed or erased, and that we must learn to live with it and find ways to move forward despite it.

Grief can be a dark and difficult path to navigate, but it can also be a transformative one. Through grief, we learn about the power of love and connection, about the importance of cherishing those we have and the memories we share. 

It's a journey that tests us, but also one that can ultimately help us grow and find purpose.

In the end, grief is a reminder of our humanity, a testament to the depth of our emotions and the fragility of life. It's something that touches us all, and though it can be painful, it's also a part of what makes us who we are.

But grief is not just about pain and suffering.

There is something inherently beautiful about the way grief brings people together, uniting us in our shared experience of loss. We come together to mourn, to remember, and to honor the lives of those we have lost. And in that coming together, we create something beautiful.

In accepting our loss and eventually going forward with it, we create something beautiful.

And in the wake of tragedy, people often find themselves driven to create, to turn their pain and sorrow into something positive and meaningful.